I’m a Little Gay For Nigella Lawson

14 Mar
Crazy dress

Nigella in a crazy dress.

Hey readers–have you watched this The-Voice-meets-Master-Chef show called The Taste? It’s over now, but you can catch all the episodes here.  The primary reason I watched was because I’m a huge fan of Nigella Lawson.  She is the perfect romance heroine, in my mind.  Really gorgeous, British, and she’s super into comfort food.

Her figure is whack.  Naturally slender arms and legs, total hourglass.  Very large breasted.  It’s a classic va-va-voom figure and it’s a figure that’s gotten larger, and shrunk again.  To me, she’s a very glamorous woman with a great body.  She even has crazy large ears she hides under all that hair.

I first went swooney over her cookbooks, and and of course, a million college guys sat drooling over her cooking show. While their eyes glazed over with lust, and they contemplated their sudden mother/older-woman fixation, Nigella would make some slathered and luscious yet uncomplicated dessert that required just the right amount of finger licking before it was finished.  Always sexy, in her earth-goddess way, but never cheap–that’s what I like about Nigella.

A cray-cray figure

A cray-cray figure

She’s also got that classic romance heroine arc going on in her life. After a privileged youth, she suffered tragedy with the illness and death of her first husband.  She’s overcome all that, and she’s risen as well above the bullying she’d gotten from the cooking world and British tabloids about her weight gain.  (Gordon Ramsay was particularly nasty on his show The F Word about her weight.)

She older now, too, and I fear for what kind of chemical-frankenstein-hollywood terror she could be putting face and body through to try and match up to her youth.  I actually like the way her body looks now.  It’s more real, and just as amazing to my mind.  I enjoyed seeing who she was on the show–how she was up front about what she liked and why.  We got to see her question her own strategy and try to find a way to gracefully handle the decimation of her team.

I also liked Ludo, the French Chef they had on the show.  He was the outsider, with an accent as thick as beurre blanc.  Ludo has the supreme Gallic charm and flirty sexuality–but you can see he’s taking the playing right to the edge, and that in his eyes he’s a split second away from letting go.  He also has the Gallic temper that comes out of now where like a flash flood.  His fury cracks over the head of his team, and then just as quickly goes away again.  His team was almost unbeatable in the challenges.  When he helped–they were supreme.

Ludo n NigellaHe and Nigella were the show for me.  However, if I had to choose which one I had to sleep with–as tempting as Ludo is–I’d have go with Nigella.  That’s just the way it is.  She turns straight women gay.

Anthony Bourdain meanwhile,–eh.  I mean, I think I came away liking him better than I did before I watched the show.  I’d always thought him rather arrogant before.  He’s a little too real for me.  The New Jersey guy with his sack of issues. Whereas I find something inspirational about Ludo and Nigella. The greatness of the show was that you got to see some seriously gorgeous people who were very passionate about food.  For them, the taste of great food was sex in their mouths.

Speaking of people who are passionately aroused by food — have you checked out Liz Everly’s book Saffron Nights? It’s on sale right now for $1.99 online at Barnes & Nobel.  Check it out here.


21 Responses to “I’m a Little Gay For Nigella Lawson”

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  2. S. J. Maylee March 16, 2013 at 8:48 am #

    I love Nigella, fell for her back when Nigella Bites was on. She’s completely fabulous. That figure, the way she talks Yeap, she can turn straight girls gay for sure, lol.


    • madelineiva March 16, 2013 at 10:22 am #

      She’s exactly what I like about romance–comforting and sexy together. Thanks for stopping by!


  3. Sofie Couch March 15, 2013 at 7:22 pm #

    You-crack-me-up! ‘Nough said.


  4. Elizabeth Shore March 14, 2013 at 5:15 pm #

    I have to admit she’s grown on me. When I first started seeing her on the Food Network, she did a show on comfort food and made couscous. Now, I’ve got no issues with couscous per se, but comfort food it’s not (to me). So I felt like I couldn’t relate. However, I started learning about her, and know some of the things she’s gone through in her personal life, and I’ve started digging her. And Liz, I’m downloading Saffron Nights!


    • LizEverly March 15, 2013 at 4:58 am #

      Thanks so much, Elizabeth. Hope you like it!


  5. LizEverly March 14, 2013 at 2:38 pm #

    Reblogged this on Liz Everly and commented:
    Madeline Iva gives a big shout out to Saffron Nights with her post, “I’m a Little Gay for Nigella Lawson.” heh.Thanks, Madeline!


  6. Misty Dietz March 14, 2013 at 10:57 am #

    By the way, I just downloaded my copy of Saffron Nights! 🙂


  7. Misty Dietz March 14, 2013 at 10:52 am #

    Madeline. Are you sharing my brain?! I have a post drafted as we speak about my girl-crush on Nigella!!! You’ve said everything so much better, though, so I’m deleting mine and probably just going to reblog yours. LOL!

    Did you know that she refused to have her tummy photoshopped out in her official static ad with the guys on The Taste? She said, “Although it was very thrilling to think of being up on a billboard in LA and around the States, I was very strict and English and told them they weren’t allowed to airbrush my tummy out. Wise? Hmmm. But that tum is the truth and is come by honestly, as my granny would have said.”

    Here’s the link (and I’m crazy about her dress – OMG!):

    I love her.


    • madelineiva March 14, 2013 at 11:37 am #

      Brilliant minds, Misty! I’m SO happy she put her foot down on the photoshopping. How can we get some of that strict and English here in America? I love that she said the ‘tum was come by honestly.’ Awesome!


  8. LizEverly March 14, 2013 at 10:21 am #

    Well, Madeline, thanks so much for the shout out. Nigella makes my heart sing! Thanks so much Margery, too, for remembering! I am a big fan of Tony Bourdain and, as I mentioned in a post on my own blog, I sort of based my photographer in SAFFRON on Tony. 😉


    • madelineiva March 14, 2013 at 11:38 am #

      Tony is good looking, I’ll give him that. You especially got to see it on the taste when he was hanging out. He is a talented hanger-out-er. ;>


      • LizEverly March 14, 2013 at 12:22 pm #

        Also, he’s a fabulous writer, even outside of his food books. The other thing I like about him is his knowledge of food. Plus, his snarky attitude is so honest. I don’t like his stance of vegetarians, personally, but I do like his honesty. Many chefs feel the same way he does, but never publicly state it. So, while I disagree with him on MANY things, I respect and admire that integrity. I’d love to have a beer with him. 😉


  9. ellaquinnauthor March 14, 2013 at 9:35 am #

    I like cooking and eating, but After the Galloping Gourmet and Justin went off the air, I never watched another cooking show. I may have to check Nigella out. Thanks for the post. I tweeted.


  10. cmkempe March 14, 2013 at 9:28 am #

    I read an earlier version of Saffron Nights which was just *exquisite*! I’m not a cook but I like eating and it’s such a sensual treat. Probably the reason I surround myself with men who cook. I have to say luscious women like Nigella are far more attractive to me.


    • madelineiva March 14, 2013 at 11:40 am #

      Men who cook have a special place in my heart. Guys who are nurturing in a real guy-guy way get my motor racing.



  1. Christmas Cheer From Lady Smut | Lady Smut - December 25, 2013

    […] Our own Madeline Iva’s feeling a little gay for sexy British chef Nigella Lawson. […]


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