A couple of weeks ago I wrote a post about the “man rules,” a listing of several things men supposedly want us to know about them. These “rules” were really more of a tongue-in-cheek humorous set of bullet points than a serious treatise on the insights of guys. But recently a friend forwarded me an “insider’s” secrets of things about men every woman must know, and my-oh-my, what a find! Newsflash for you, ladies: unlike the “man rules,” mastering these tips is apparently going to lead us all toward relationship nirvana.
The twenty-one tips are assembled by the self-appointed “Queen of Hearts,” Kim Sarrasin. Kim’s a relationship coach whose aptly named website, AttractYourKing.com, lets you know all about her. Her bio states that she’s got one mission in life, which is to “heal the hearts of women worldwide and end your suffering with men. Kim joyfully dedicates her life to empowering women like you with the tools and relationship wisdom you need to easily make it work with any man.” Hmm. Well, that sounds pretty good (and pretty expensive!), but let’s see what she’s got. After all, we at Lady Smut love romance, so if there’s someone out there who can help us unravel the pesky mysteries of men and fulfill our heart’s desires, we’re all for it. With eager anticipation, I reviewed the 21 tips.
Tip #1: Men Can’t Read Your Mind. This sounds oddly familiar, as if I’ve heard it somewhere before. But I read on. “You have to give up feeling it’s more romantic if he guesses. The only result will be him remaining clueless to what you want and you never getting your needs met. Not a party I would want to attend.” Nor would I, Kim. This all makes sense, but . . . wait! I just realize why it’s familiar. It’s part of the Man Rules! To wit: the very first “rule” on the list is, “Men are not mind readers.” Well, geez. Why do I need to pay big bucks to Kim if I can get the same “wisdom” all for nothing from a web post making the rounds?
Perturbed yet undaunted, I read on to the second tip. “Men are logical and need CLEAR instructions about how to make you happy.” Again, bells of familiarity go a-clanging in my head. Taking a second look at the Man Rules, my hunch is confirmed: Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one. Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
So far, I’m not overly impressed. The same advice in a silly post making its way across the virtual globe is being passed along by a relationship coach to entice potential users of her service to sign on as clients. Nonetheless, I don’t want to be unfairly critical so I decided to run the “Queen of Hearts” tips past some guys I trust to tell me straight what they think of them. Well, shut the front door! Turns out that the results of my very unscientific poll revealed several of the tips to be universally agreed upon by the guys I asked. Who knew!
The truth is, I’m not necessarily opposed to someone compiling information on one sex or the other that’s meant to educate. After all, such info may actually lend insight and be helpful. What I take umbrage with is the suggestion that all one needs to do is master a rather arbitrary set of “tips” to be granted your heart’s desire. To find the soulmate you’ve always wanted. The blurb at the onset of Kim Sarrasin’s tips states, “21 insider secrets and proven tips that will make him fall madly in love with you.” It’s a great marketing tool for the “Queen of Hearts,” but as real a guarantee of finding true love as that mythical pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
Certainly there are similarities among women just as there are among men, and it’s fun to bucket the two sex’s behavior in a humorous listing of things for the opposite sex to know. If you’d like the full listing of Kim Sarrasin’s tips, click here. But for me the best tip is this: ditch the list of “things you must know” and find your soulmate the old-fashioned way, by meeting someone you like hanging out with and who appreciates the uniqueness of who you are.
What do you think of the tips? Good advice, or a hollow promise that doesn’t ring true. Sounds off in the comments below. And don’t forget to follow us at Lady Smut. We’ll always pass along good tips.