So I’m thumbing through the latest issue of InStyle magazine the other day when I spot an interview with Cameron Diaz who’s talking about – of all things – pubic hair. Egad! I gotta admit, however, that she’s pretty passionate on the topic, stating that it’s a conversation we gals should have. “It’s the taboo of lady parts!” she exclaims, backing up her statement with what she’s written in her health/wellness bestseller, The Body Book. She writes, “I think permanent hair removal sounds like a crazy idea . . . Twenty years from now you will still want to be presenting it to someone special, and it would be nice to let him or her unwrap it like the gift that it is.”
Frankly, I’m not sure guys (or whoever happens to be heading south on you) think of “unwrapping” that lady-est of lady part when it comes to dealing with a hairy hoo-hoo, but I get Diaz’s point. You don’t necessarily want to be smooth as an egg forever. Fads change and today’s Kojak bald could be tomorrow’s fluffy muff. But it just seems like lately there are so many celebrities talking about the hair down there. From Gwyneth Paltrow’s declaration that she “rocks a ’70s bush” to Lady Gaga demanding a mannequin with puffy pink pubic hair accompany her on tour, there’s an awful lot of carpet matching the drapes talk goin’ on. What gives?
“Frankly,” a friend told me recently, “I really don’t think guys think much about it. We care a lot more than they do.” She has a point. We’re coming up with all kinds of creative ways to groom the garden. As far as we gals are concerned, the simple landing strip just isn’t going to fly. Women today are paring the pubes in all kinds of shapes and designs, from little squares (the “postage stamp”) to hearts, flowers, and more. I even came across a website, pubicstyle.com, where readers send in vajayay selfies with the style they’re currently sporting. Yet for whatever it’s worth, a recent poll asking men for their favorite lady bit styles had 33% of men favoring the natural look, with a classic Bermuda triangle coming in second. Hearts and squares and flowers? Meh.
OK, so you decide you’re going to stop with the painful Brazilian and keep some grass on the lawn. But what if said grass is starting to, you know, age a bit? If you’re earning the moniker of the “silver fox” and it’s not because of the hair atop your head, what’s a pube-lovin’ girl to do? Elementary, my dear. You dye it.
There are plenty of resources for dyeing pubic hair, but the one that keeps coming up over and over is a company called Betty, whose tagline is “color for the hair down there.” Betty offers an assortment of the usual natural colors, brown, black, blonde, but you can also have fun and go for a specialty color like green, pink, or blue. Said to be safe for the sensitive area, Betty can be used frequently and the manufacturer recommends dyeing one’s pubes every 3-4 weeks.
Cultural preferences play a role as well. While critics of the hairless hoo-hoo cite porn as the driving factor behind it, that doesn’t universally apply. For example, there’s no shortage of pussies with pubes among Japanese porn actresses.
So, armed with this information, how’s a romance writer to respond? If women apparently care about the hair below as much as the effort spent down there seems to indicate, should we writers incorporate that into the romance? I’ve read scenes where “springy dark curls” or something like that get an occasional mention, but for the most part our lady gardens seem to be haira non grata. With the hairless coochie apparently being kicked to the curb, should bushy mounds be getting their due? Do readers want to read about it?