By Alexa Day
A list of women’s ten favorite sexual fantasies? Elizabeth Shore pointed it out on Saturday with — I imagine — a raised eyebrow. But I figured I’d check it out. I’m a woman, after all. I have fantasies.
I figured I’d see some old chestnuts — the rape fantasy has been on that list for years with the same warnings about how it’s a fantasy and not the desire to be raped. But as I read along and then moved into the list of men’s fantasies and then the sort of kinky ways to bring kink into the bedroom if you’re not that kinky, I realized that I was really reading with a professional interest. I wondered if this was the sort of thing women wanted to read about and whether I could write about them.
I hadn’t really stopped to think about what *I* wanted.
So what do I want?
Tough to say.
Right now, reality is crowding fantasy into a very professional corner. I’m preparing for a move, so I’ve got my hands full packing up the essentials of my life as the seasons change. Last week, as the weather turned, I was disappointed to find that all my closed-toe shoes and the teapot are already boxed up. Who has time for a genuine sexual fantasy? Not me.
Does anybody have that kind of time? Is that why we have these lists? To give us a set of easy, fill in the blank suggestions to kickstart some sexy fun?
I hope not. I mean, I hate to think that my fantasy life is that out of balance, but things have been pretty crazy lately.
Still, I’m worried about falling into a fantasy rut. I don’t want my go-to fantasy (and no, I’m not sharing, he’s all mine) to become a reliable standby just because I don’t have time to do better.
So I tried something else.
I settled down on the corner of the couch and closed my eyes. I let my hands rest, palms up, on my knees, and I gave myself time to meditate. You know, concentrating without focusing. Just relaxing.
And I asked myself, what do I really want right now?
The easy answer — I want to be warm, dammit — gave way to any number of warm and pleasant thoughts, none of which was on that top ten list.
So before I go back to letting one fantasy (radiator heat) elide into another (still not telling), I challenge you: what has your fantasy life done for you lately? Is it time for something fresh?
And are you following Lady Smut? We won’t leave you cold.