May 18, 2016

Building Up Confidence, One Gigolo At A Time

Cowboys4Angels Gigolos, as seen on the Showtime series
Cowboys4Angels Gigolos, as seen on the Showtime series

By Elizabeth Shore

We all have our guilty pleasures, right? Like eating an entire box of Froot Loops in one sitting. Or pretending you’re a rock star and singing your heart out into a spoon microphone. Viewing endless hours of cute kitten videos on YouTube. You get the drift. For me, as many faithful LadySmut readers know, my guilty pleasure confession is an incurable addiction to the Showtime series Gigolos. I’m sorry to say that the most recent season – (sniff) – has just ended. Yet what a season it was!

As Captain Obvious would point out, a hugely appealing aspect of the show is simply looking at the Adonis-like bodies of the Gigolos themselves. While they’re naked. It’s pure, uncut, eye-candy crack. As well it should be. After all, the service of these guys doesn’t come cheap, so if you’re going to plunk down the cash you sure as heck better be getting a handsome return. And, well, you do. To wit:

Nick Hawk
Nick Hawk
Vin Armani
Vin Armani
Bradley Lords
Bradley Lords
Ash Armand
Ash Armand









Handsome indeed. To be clear, what one is paying for with these guys is their time. What you choose to do with that time…well, that’s between him and you. But in truth that’s what I find interesting about the entire premise. When I first saw this show I wondered, and blogged, about what kind of woman would hire a gigolo in the first place. And for what reason? This last season seemed to put added focus on answering that question via the interviews with clients. My personal favorite was the insight given by one of them who just happened to be a little person.

This client made a rather heartbreaking confession to Gigolo Vin that she often gets interest from men for no reason other than because they have a dwarfism fetish. Talk about a soul crusher! You think a guy’s into you, but turns out it’s only because you’d fulfill his secret fantasy of (fill in the blank): having sex with a large woman. Or an Asian woman. Or someone with a disability. There are, sadly, a lot of sick jerks out there with callous disregard for a woman’s feelings. They couldn’t care less if she gets hurts as long as he gets off. The majority of men, thankfully, aren’t like this. But encountering those who are have scarred and scared lots of women from having successful relationships. Such was the case with the woman who’s a little person. Enter, Gigolo Vin.

Vin himself confessed nervousness about the “date,” as they’re referred to. He’d not been with a little person before. Would the sex be different? Did he need to be afraid of hurting her? Turns out, his fears were for naught. The encounter appeared, from this viewer’s vantage point, anyway, to be wholly satisfying for them both. The little person said she loved her date, loved how Vin made her feel, and would highly recommend the experience to others. Hmmm…

The primary appeal of the show for me is the realization of how many women struggle with self-confidence, and how a date with a Gigolo genuinely seems to give them a boost. There’s a heady feeling of gratification, after all, from a man giving you attention, saying you’re beautiful or smart or sexy or strong or whatever attribute makes you feel fabulous about yourself. The cynic in me points out that these women are paying to be queen for a day, so of course the guys will shower them with compliments. It’s part of the deal! But when the Gigolos are interviewed, they repeatedly emphasize how much they enjoy women, all kinds of women, in all shapes and sizes. As Vin said, “When I’m with a woman, I’m having fun.” And if the encounter gives the woman a well-needed shot of confidence, that sounds pretty good to me.





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  • Post authordave94015

    Reblogged this on dave94015 and commented:
    what is it that #gigolos can do…for women?!

    Reply to dave94015
  • Post authorKel

    Personally, I think the world would be a better place if humans could get their need fulfilled in safe, sane, consensual ways without judgement all the darned time. If that means that sometimes (all the time?) professionals are involved, maybe more humans would have good experiences. Humans are messy. Humans have needs. Sometimes… sometimes having those needs fulfilled is hard, but it’s still important.

    And this ties oddly into my thoughts on emotional work. Yay, gigolos?

    • Post authorElizabeth Shore

      Honestly, and maybe I’m just drinking the Gigolos kool-aid, but they really do seem to take stock in a job well done. And that job, for them, is making their clients feel satisfied, in whatever way they need to be.

      Reply to Elizabeth Shore
  • Post authordjcracoiva

    I can’t help but think it’s a double edge sword for the lady who pays. Yes, she gets the undivided attention of man and for the time spent together a boost in confidence, but what happens afterwards, when she goes back to her real life and finds it’s not any different?
    Gigolos is also a guilty pleasure of mind *wink, wink*

    Reply to djcracoiva
  • Post authorMadeline Iva

    I think I commented on this before, but I remember an interview with a male prostitute who did it for drug money, but was driven into rehab because of the nature of the biz. He said it wasn’t having sex with the men that was the problem, it was constantly having to pretend to be in love with them that finally drove him into rehab.

    And here seem to lie the key difference.

    He resented feeling his male client’s already bloated egos.

    Whereas with gigolos it seems like they feel they’re doing a public service. Taking women who are unconfident, or lonely, or unappreciated and bringing them some reassurance, some attention. They can feel like what they are doing is helpful and that it matters. This makes a job feel worthwhile to some.

    I kinda feel like this was the message in Magic Mike XXL. The first movie was really a bit of a satiric take on ‘the life’. On the other hand, they made a ton of money off it. For the second film, it seemed like they took a more earnest look at ‘the life’ and listened to what the people in ‘the life’ had to say about its value — which was simply giving women some joy and cathartic release.

    That said, I’m sure there’s plenty that’s oogie about being a gigolo too, like there is in any kind of sex work — or for that matter, any kind of service industry work where you’re up close and personal with strangers, tending to their needs. Not work for the faint of heart..

    Reply to Madeline Iva

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