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Kiss and Tell: Guest post by Christina Mitchell

5 Mar

By Christina Mitchell

I love first kisses. I love watching them and reading about them. Ennis and Jack. Logan and Veronica.  Megan and Graham. Weetzie Bat and My Secret Agent Lover Man. So many swoons. But in real life, they aren’t always so wonderful. I’ve had a lot more more like Cordelia & Wesley than I have Buffy & Angel. Mostly because I tend to make awkward situations exponentially more awkward and my unintentional comedic timing is superb.

Here’s Cordelia & Wesley’s Awkward Kiss — in which we learn that lust and chemistry are not the same thing.

At 13, I was madly in love with the 16-year-old boy down the street. He wore ripped jeans and had an undercut with a curly blonde ponytail, like my beloved New Kid, Donnie. My diary entries dripped with love and hate, depending on the day. We played a naughty version of red light, green light, with his hand going further and further up my skirt until I shouted RED LIGHT right before he touched my panties. One day we were wrestling around and he picked me up and tossed me on his mom’s bed and gave me my very first kiss. I can’t fault his technique. I’m not opposed to the Me Tarzan, You Jane school of lovin’, but he went in with a bit too much gusto and jammed his tongue all the way to my uvula. Not prepared for literal tonsil-hockey, I shoved him off me, ran to the bathroom and dry-heaved. Which was a bit of a mood-killer. We never really flirted or spoke much after that and my poor diary combusted beneath the flames of my angst.

So I kept my lips (and uvula) to myself until I was 16. I flirted with a boy with a speech impediment who called me KWES-TEENA and wore his drum major bucket hat all the time, even with his t-shirts and jeans. My friends were like, CHRISTINA. NO. But I thought he was quirky and adorable. After two tepid weeks of talking on the phone, the manic pixie dream boy met me in an empty, dark classroom, and went in for a kiss. Don’t know why, but I panicked and jerked my head away at the last minute, and he ended up licking me from the corner of my mouth to my jaw which caused me to burst out into hysterical giggles that wouldn’t stop, until he mumbled an excuse and left the room. Can’t imagine why, but he broke up with me the next day.

sexy bucket hat

Too sexy for this hat.

Then there was that guy I made out with on the bus with the giant raver pants, chain wallet and Marilyn Manson t-shirt. And that other guy I made out with on the bus who didn’t wear raver pants, but did stalk me for a few weeks afterward–hey, we all have that summer, amiright?

At 20, I met a hot gamer. Yes, bucking stereotypes like a motherfucker, this guy was great looking, had his own house and played live action Mage: The Ascension at the most dingy comics shop in town. After game one night, I missed the last bus. It was snow-storming out and he offered to let me stay the night on his couch. I didn’t know how old he was, hell I didn’t even know his last name, but I said yes, because everything looks like a green flag when you’re young and horny. So we sat on the couch and talked for hours. The flirting got heavier and suddenly he yanked me onto his lap,  dug his hands into my braids and gave me THE MOST AMAZING KISS I’ve ever had in my life. No offense to those who kissed me afterward, including my wonderfully kissable hubs, but this guy was a triple gold medalist in Tongue Curling at the Smooch-Olympics. I wish I could describe what made it so fantastic, but I have no idea. The whole time we made out, my brain kept crashing like Windows going straight to the blue screen of death.

Things got hotter and I remember feeling victorious. Nothing would screw up this magical moment! I wriggled around on his lap and my body got all tight and aching. Really aching. Unpleasantly aching. Wow, my stomach hurt. And then…I started my period. Yes. You do not understand awkward until you have your hand in a stranger’s pants and their hand is in yours, just as a rush of uterine hate sluices forth from your wretched baby-maker, turning the hottest experience of your young life into the most awkward encounter you’ll ever have*. We called it quits and he bid me an bemused goodnight. And since I wasn’t carrying a purse with me, I had to make a maxi-pad out of toilet paper whilst contemplating the folly of desire. Oh, and in the morning, he told me he had a girlfriend anyway.

It’s a miracle we humans ever try again, isn’t it? But try I did.  Years later, on a second date with a nice guy I’d met on the internet,  we were standing in a parking lot, outside of CiCi’s Pizza. He was being a total gentleman and I was totally over it.  So I grabbed him by the collar of his polo shirt and kissed him. He had the most delightfully glazed look when I pulled away and then he went for it, giving me a bone-meltingly slow kiss that made my brain short-circuit in a different way.  When I said goodnight and got into my car, Nora Jones’ “Turn Me On” blasted from the radio. I drove home in a fog of giggles and swoons and wrote in my Live Journal that I was in “deep, deep trouble.”  And I was right. I married that guy.

Still though, it’s rare for life to offer up a truly magical first kiss. That’s why we writers do it for you. That satisfyingly deep, dark vortex of desire, the surety of intent, the crashing of lips against each other without the corresponding chipping of teeth, is fiction at it’s best.

*Writing is my gift.

Christina Mitchell writes love stories that fall somewhere between the dark humor of David Sedaris and the sensitive lyricism of Metallica. Her first novel, How to Stay will be available…mumble mumble 2018? Follow her on FacebookTwitter, and Instagram.

 

I’m off…

23 Feb

…to London for RARE18, an international gathering of people who love romance–authors, readers, bloggers, cover models… Here, have some man inspiration while I’m gone. Rumor has it Stuart Reardon will be there. I’ll be reporting back in March on all things RARE and wonderful! If I manage to smuggle out a cover model (or two), you’ll be the first to know. Pinky swear.

Is he to die for or what?

$25 Amazon.com Gift Card and Books in the Black Friday Giveaway

24 Nov

By Elizabeth SaFleur, Isabelle Drake, Elizabeth Shore, Kiersten Hallie Krum, and Madeline Iva

You could use a $25 Amazon.com gift card, right? And more book boyfriends? How about a surprise present, too? One winner will receive all these prizes in the LadySmut Black Friday Giveaway happening today through December 1. Winner announced on Sunday, December 3 on this blog post and on the Lady Smut Romance blog Facebook page.

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Don’t Call Me Darlin’

3 Nov

By Alexa Day

Darlin’.

It’s a popular term of endearment in Romancelandia.

I hate it.

The word darlin’ inspires in me the same disgust many people experience upon hearing the word moist. If I had to choose between the two of them (and please don’t make me do that), I might actually choose moist. I hate darlin’ just that much.

I’m not totally against pet names and such. Honey and sweetheart always sound condescending to me; perhaps this new Age of Sarcasm has sucked the sugar out of them. Speaking of which, I could be sold on Sugar, under the right conditions. I’d pick babe instead of baby. I like the idea of the secret nicknames that my special friend(s) and I might choose for each other. Hell, I wrote a short story in which the cowboy hero called the birthday girl Sugar Tits. Perhaps a bit coarse for some people’s tastes, but the heroine didn’t mind it one little bit.

Sugar Tits, coming from the right mouth with the right intent, would sound like music. Hot, sexy music. The kind a woman tells stories about later. Darlin’ lacks that potential.

But why?

Maybe it’s the newish trend of assigning cutesy-boo nicknames to things that once bore more straightforward nomenclature. Ghosting and submarining, for example, refer to specific classes of behavior that we used to call fuckwittage, or simply being an ass, back in my day. (For those unfamiliar, ghosting is when someone disappears in the middle of an established pattern of communication, forming in the early stages of courtship. Submarining is when the ghost suddenly reappears as if he had not been an ass in the first place.) I guess a single girl is more likely to read advice about how to handle submarining than she is to seek insight about what to do when a man is being an ass. No one wants to feel responsible for communicating with an ass. Still, calling it submarining or ghosting or whatever makes this fuckwittage sound like normal, acceptable behavior.

Darlin’ strikes a nearby nerve. It sounds like baby talk to me. Something women think men say. Something a little phony. The kind of thing a man calls a woman when he doesn’t remember her name. My knee-jerk reaction upon reading it is to wonder what led this man to call this woman darlin’. Where did he hear it? Isn’t it straight out of country songs and black-and-white movies?

As I was taking my notes for this part of the post, I thought of my esteemed colleague, award-winning author Kiersten Hallie Krum. In my mind’s eye, I could see her smiling and shaking her head. In my mind’s eye, Kiersten called bullshit.

If Jason Isaacs called you darlin’ just one time, Kiersten said, I bet you would abandon this line of complaints forever.

She’s not wrong. Two weeks ago, I did a giddy little dance while throwing six dollars plus a generous tip at my television. (That’ll make more sense if you click here.)

There’s also a rumor that looking directly into Jason’s eyes renders one susceptible to suggestion. So I suppose that if we were looking right at each other, I would not be inclined to make much fuss over darlin’. I’d prefer Sugar Tits, but it should be noted that no one has asked about my preferences in that regard, least of all Jason himself.

This is an exceptional case, though. It matters, but it doesn’t alter the general rule.

Don’t call me darlin’. Or Sugar Tits, just to be safe. Maybe avoid honey and sweetheart. The sound of my own name, on a familiar tongue, is endearing enough.

For now.

Follow Lady Smut.

Curious about that Sugar Tits story? Well, signing up for my newsletter is the only way to learn how a woman goes looking for a mechanical bull and ends up finding a hot cowboy. Click here for that win-win story and the fast track to news about my new releases, free reads, and other exclusive content. See you there, darlin’.

Sexy Saturday Round Up

7 Oct

The week has whiffled by and now it’s Saturday.  Time to cuddle with our sexy round up of crazy links from around the web.  Sip your hot tea, sit back in bed and enjoy!

From Madeline:

Taking the joke engagement photo to a whole new level.

Savage love breaks out into really good sex stories.

The infamous “romance round up” NYTimes article—was less an ode and more of a snarky, condescending hate letter.  A man named Robert Gottlieb, who despite supposedly being ‘a voracious reader of contemporary romance’  clearly despises the genre. Romance readers one and all were howling with rage after reading his article.  Now comes the  #sorrynotsorry response by Radhika Jones of the times.  In this article she attempts the difficult hat trick of sneering at a genre while at the same time trying to engage the genre’s fans.

Have you been put on the backburner?

The wonderful world of Renaissance fair kink.

Drag Queens Rule–at Bushwig.

Saudi women take the wheel — now to abolish male guardianship.

Harvey Weinstein’s name is synonymous with the term ‘aggressive assh*le.’  This article suggests feminism took a giant step forward in 2017 when women started not only speaking out against sexual harassment, but expected U.S. media to notice and listen.

From Elizabeth Shore:

“Medabation,” anyone? Getting in the mood to give yourself some love.

Does having less attractive friends affect your relationship with them?

What else (besides the obvious) could you use a dildo for? Why, putting on your foundation, of course.

Who are the most vocal clitoris activists right now? The French. Naturally.

Meet Simon, the BDSM furniture maker.

 

Sexy Saturday Round Up

30 Sep

It’s sunny outside and Sexy Saturday Round Up inside! Curl up with these links about women, gender, sex, & romance news.  Buckled in? Here we go–

From Madeline:

Who says women ruin chances at marriage by having a lot of sex right away?

Hiddlesbottom says he’s kinda surprised he’s still playing Loki.

Kinky requests for a male escort.

Your egg as a ‘hitching post’ and other new versions of conceptualizations for how sex really works according to less sexist conceptions of science.

Bitch Podcast: Why we love sports–even though they’re so problematic for feminism.  

From Elizabeth Shore:

Why it’s a really, really bad idea to get an eyeball tattoo.

And then there are the vagina piercings.

Thinking about getting high on psychodelic honey? You might want to rethink that.

The secret to great sex? Lots o’ lube.

XOXOAfter Dark lists the 100 romances you must read before you die.

 

 

The Author Witness Protection Program and Other Writerly Secrets

28 Sep

By Elizabeth SaFleur

It’s Throwback Thursday, and we’re putting up popular posts for your enjoyment. Below is a blog post that first appeared on our LadySmut Romance Blog Facebook page. Give the page a “like” if you haven’t done so and never miss our shenanigans.

The Author Witness Protection Program and Other Writerly Secrets

Ever wonder what life is like for your favorite author? Not the stuff you see on Facebook or Twitter. Not the sunshine and roses or even ranty stuff. I mean the Stuff We Never Talk About. Here are secrets that might be just me. But then, again, who knows? For instance….

I have often put my life in danger in the name of research.

First, there is Death By Boredom. I watched three hours of Supreme Court documentary hell. I suffered through this for ONE LINE so it’d be accurate. Even my husband turned to me half way through and asked, “can we be done with this?” This question came from a man who gets a thrill when the new year’s Tax Code comes in the mail. (This two inch book makes him happy. It whispers “deductions.”)

As if that’s not enough I’m going to take a tour of the Supreme Court so I can describe the marble correctly. Honestly, this book cannot be published (The Supreme Spanking, the third Justice series novella) without this trip.

There also is death by Real Crazy Shit. Like I needed to know how it feels to get a fishing hook stuck in your hand for a book I’m writing right now. I asked my husband to do this to me. He refused. I felt unsupported. So, instead I’m YouTubing what it’s like to have a piece of metal pierce your flesh. Hey, marriage is all about compromise.

Since I have BDSM elements in many of my books I have also sampled some Other Wild Things. I can tell you this: Wax play is awesome. Fireplay isn’t so bad. The Violet Wand is evil incarnate. A whole other post could be about the BDSM Stuff I’ve Done. But let’s not let that topic hijack the other parts that are important to note, like ….

Pseudonyms are often critical to an author’s life.

We aren’t trying to keep ourselves from you, dear reader. Oh, no. For some of us, a pen name is like an Author Witness Protection Program (AWPP). It keeps the mortgage-paying clients in our day jobs from throwing our buttinskis on the street. If my uber-conservative clients knew what I wrote? They would have a heart attack. No matter they have s-e-x themselves, but my writing about the horizontal mambo? Heavens to Betsy and Holy Smokes!

For other writers, pen names are a safety thing. We don’t want crazed serial killers and mentally delusional people showing up at our house. I might write about a kidnapped girl falling in love with the guy (who turned out to have no choice and is really good underneath), but that doesn’t mean I want that to happen to me – with them! (Jason Momoa, if you are reading this post, I give you carte blanche to kidnap me. In fact, I’ll be sitting on my front porch in about 5 minutes. I’ll go quietly.)

Book Butt clearly was inevitable.

Or call it Author Ass. It’s all the same poundage on the hippage. I gained 20 pounds in the last two years thanks to  my books Lovely, Untouchable, Perfect and Lucky. That’s 5 pounds per story. It’s like the college Freshman Ten, except back then you didn’t have your current responsibilities and got to go home with the guy manning the keg. The current BB/AA syndrome is so prevalent that the #RomanceFit online group is a thing – like a very real, very necessary thing. I tried to join this online support group’s fun, but I kept forgetting to log in those 5 miles that I never ran. What can I say?

P.S. Don’t yell at me saying I just called a bunch of romance authors fat. I did not. I mean, have you SEEN J.R. Ward? I’m just sayin’ I didn’t realize MY 20 pounds came with publishing. That’s all. Lay down the sword—unless you can carve out those 20 pounds. If so, have at it.

I (sometimes/often/perhaps always) love my characters more than real people.

I love it when plans get cancelled. It means I can stay home and play with my fictional Doms. (Is that bad?) This last summer has been hellish with family invasions of all types – father, stepmother, cousins, children of cousins, stepsons and wives – who have taken me away from my characters! Do you think I’m horrible? No, don’t tell me because…

I care what you think.

MOST of us care what you think. Like really, really care. That’s why we read our reviews and check our rankings – some of us to obsessive levels. Sure, some writers do this more than others. Yet, I cringe a little when an author boasts on social media, “I never read reviews! They are for readers! I don’t need to see them!” Uh, huh. Right. You sneak a peek now and then, don’t you? Admit it. And, you know what’s worse? When we don’t have reviews at all. (Sniff. What’s wrong with my books?? No one loves me!!)

But we love you at Ladysmut, so please keep reading us, commenting, posting and click that like button if you liked being in on these secrets.

Speaking of love, have you checked out Kiersten Hallie Krum’s latest? SEALed with a Twist. In the follow-up to the wildly popular, Library Journal starred review, RONE award finalist, WILD ON THE ROCKS, a fan favorite returns to Barefoot Bay… One click today!

~~~~~

Elizabeth SaFleur is a contemporary erotic romance author and dying-to-retire public relations practitioner who writes, tweets and posts under a pseudonym since her business clients might be (WOULD be) shocked at her second career choice. Her books, the Elite Doms of Washington and Justice series, were inspired by her thirty-year career serving D.C. clients where she learned not all power in our nation’s capital is wielded by politicians. There’s way more interesting things happening there than politics.

Hey, What’s Your Number?

21 Sep
But did I carry the one? (This image was made by Loadmaster (David R. Tribble).)

But did I carry the one?
(This image was made by Loadmaster (David R. Tribble).)

By Alexa Day

(Welcome to Lady Smut’s #ThrowbackThursday! Let’s celebrate the beginning of the school year with a little math. This post from May 2015 is all about the sexual history calculator and the intriguing calculus of our sexual pasts.)

In yesterday’s Sexy Saturday Round-Up, my colleague Elizabeth Shore provided a link to a sexual history calculator. It’s over on Slate, and it collects your age, your gender (I know, I rolled my eyes here, too, but it’s necessary), and the number of people you’ve slept with. You plug this information in, and after a brief pause, during which the calculator wants to reassure you that this is supposed to be fun for you, you get a chart that compares your info with that of other people in your age group.

Simply put, the calculator is here to tell you — just for fun! — whether you’ve slept with more people or fewer people than the rest of your demographic.

So, just for fun, I plugged in my info, and just for fun, I got back the entirely expected response that I’ve slept with more people than most women in my age group.

This is not a surprise to me.

For one thing, I’m unmarried, so I’m still counting. That number is going to keep rising. I don’t think it will continue to rise as quickly as it did when the younger Alexa had fewer things to occupy her time, but who knows for sure?

For another thing, I’m convinced that a lot of women lie about The Number. I understand in large part why this happens, but I have so little patience for that. Seriously, if we’re going to stop slut-shaming, we need to start by treating ourselves better, don’t we? I don’t know if men lie about The Number or have the same reasons for lying as women do, but I am aware that they are not being shamed for having higher Numbers in the same way as we are. No doubt this is why we have to plug our gender into the calculator.

In any event, I was more troubled by my initial inability to account for everyone on The List. You know, the one that generates The Number. I stared at it after I plugged it into that little box and asked myself, “Is that right?” And then I went back into the dusty and neglected archive that is my long-term memory and tried to name names. Then I became hungry (this took about 45 seconds) and decided to go with the number I had.

It’s probably right. I think. But I pledged to spend the rest of the day really trying to think about this. After all, I should probably know with some level of certainty what The Number is, right? And isn’t it kind of sad not to be able to put a name with each and every face in my sexual history? Shouldn’t I be troubled with the ease with which I forgot someone who was, if only for a few hours, part of my life?

Well, now I’m not so sure.

Once you get past personal health concerns, so that you know exactly who to call in the event of unpleasantness, I’m not sure there’s a need to know exactly how many people you’ve slept with. It would certainly be nice to know, but is it truly necessary? The consideration of one’s sexual history as a whole is probably deserving of more consideration.

How many did you regret?

How many taught you something?

How many did you love?

Smaller numbers, perhaps, but more important subsets.

I will probably still try to reconstruct The List so that I can verify The Number. On the one hand, the memory defect bothers me, and on the other, I feel driven to have an accurate number. But in the meantime, I’m okay with having a highlight reel until I can create a director’s cut.

As long as there’s plenty of hot, buttery popcorn.

Follow Lady Smut. We’ve been around.

Age Is Just A Number Baby

11 Sep

In case you’re not feeling so strong and sexy (our theme at LadySmut this week), may Greta Pontarelli, a 66 year old woman who took up pole dancing just 7 years ago, inspire you. Age is nothing but a number, baby.

https://www.facebook.com/plugins/video.php?href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2Fgretapontarelli%2Fvideos%2F879967698808438%2F&show_text=0&width=476

Whatever is in front of you right now, you can do it. We know you can.

Follow LadySmut. We believe in you.

~~~~~

Connect with Greta on Instagram
Follow her on Facebook
Visit her site (Pssst… she teaches!)

(Copyright owned by Greta Pontarelli. No copyright infringement intended.)

Lord of the Ropes

12 Jul

Shibari

Dear lovely people–A.C. Rose is with us again. Today she has an interview to share with us that she did with Morpheous aka Lord of the Ropes.

By A.C. Rose

What is it about ropes?

Some people think it is a little cray-cray to want to be willingly tied up. Others are anxious to try it. And there are those who attest to the sensual power of being tied up and vulnerable.

It’s fascinating to see how ropes are not just an integral part of BDSM play, and at-home sexy times, but have been elevated to an art form.

I reached out to Morpheous – that’s Lord Morpheous, to you – a sex educator, photographer, and kinkster based in New York and Toronto who knows the ropes when it comes to ropes. He is author of the new book, HOW TO BE KNOTTY: THE ESSENTIAL GUIDE TO MODERN ROPE BONDAGE. 

His book is a beautifully executed collection of images with how-to instructions that illustrate many creative ways to tie one on.

He also teaches rope safety in the book.

Morpheous has taught workshops and performed rope bondage around the world and is the founder of Morpheous’ Bondage Extravaganza, reportedly the world’s largest public rope bondage event.  His work is included in academic collections and museums, as well as published in a human sexuality textbook. He is also author of How to be Kinky: A Beginner’s Guide to BDSM and How to be Kinkier: More Adventures in Adult Playtime.

If you’ve ever wondered why ropes are such a big part of BDSM, read on.

A.C. ROSE: For those readers unfamiliar, what is rope bondage?

MORPHEOUS: Rope bondage is the practice of tying another person for the purposes of art, or sex, or sensuality; in fact, for whatever reason you and your partner do it! It comes under the umbrella as BDSM and is most often used as a communication between partners, a way of connecting in a sensual manner, of one partner handing control over to another. There is an artistic side though, and one that’s central to how most people do bondage.

A.C. ROSE: Do you have to be a professional to play with ropes or is there a safety course one should take before trying?

MORPHEOUS: You absolutely don’t need to be a professional to start exploring rope bondage, and while I’d always encourage people to have basic first aid training if they’re going to get into bondage (and, in fact, even if they’re not), you can learn everything you need to learn about safety as you learn the basics of bondage. I’ve written several books and each one of them covers bondage basics and basic bondage safety to a different extent. It’s all about communicating well, checking in often and having certain important bits of safety hardware on hand at all times.

A.C. ROSE: Why do you consider modern bondage both art and eroticism?

MORPHEOUS: The rope bondage that we know today is most often a fusion of both the Eastern and Western styles, and one has a more artistic bent while the other is more about restraint. My personal style is certainly a fusion of these two styles—with a creative twist of my own. While modern bondage is very much about restraint for sexual or sensory purposes, the shapes of the body, the shapes of the rope and the different materials used means that there’s an incredible art to it—not to mention to the process of tying itself. Watching a talented rigger tie their submissive is almost as sexual as being tied yourself. The fluidity of the movement, the lines, the patterns, the almost visible chemistry between the two…it’s nothing short of art.

A.C. ROSE: Many people find the idea of being tied up a scary because of the connotation of being tied up, yet some are drawn to it, and find it exciting.  What is the draw to those who like it?

MORPHEOUS: The draw is, I think, that very vulnerability that some people find scary. To hand yourself over completely to another person is very intense, and it’s that intensity that is at the heart of all BDSM play. Whether you’re being tied or being spanked or letting someone mess with your head, its all based on the trust that you have in that other person—which is why it’s also so important to only play with people who you can trust and who have proven themselves to be trustworthy.A.C. ROSE: When you are working with ropes, are you a master, artist, or hedonist?

MORPHEOUS: I’m all three! The hedonism comes from the thrill of the connection and of the process of bondage; at no point does your desire for sexual contact or the drive to master someone else overcome your consideration for their wellbeing. A good rigger (the person who ties someone else) always, always has safety and security at the forefront of their mind. But then domination of your partner and artistic creativity are also in there too.

A.C. ROSE: There are many different examples in How to Be Knotty. Do you have a favorite technique? And why.

MORPHEOUS: It would be impossible for me to pick a favorite tie or type of tie. My favorite knots and binds change according to who I’m tying and for what purpose. Sometimes you don’t want to engage in intense sex play but you want to feel connected to your partner; the ties that I choose at that point will be very different to the ties I choose for a hot and heavy session. It also changes according to the body type and limitations of your partner. For instance, some people are more flexible than others; some have larger muscles or body parts in certain places, and some just don’t like to have rope across their chests or between their legs or around their hands. The beauty of bondage is that it is so adaptable—and it’s so fun to play with!

A.C. ROSE: Can you explain what ‘sub space’ is and how people get there?

MORPHEOUS: Subspace is the mental space that some submissives reach when they are tied (or when they are otherwise engaged in BDSM play). In subspace you’re consumed by your immediate sensory experience; everything else seems to drop away, and you become serene in the space you’re in, your connection with your rigger front and center of your being. It’s a glorious place to be—although, much like with orgasm, some people find it much easier to reach than others and some might never achieve it.

A.C. ROSE: Once someone is tied, what are some of the pleasures that are administered? Anything goes?

MORPHEOUS: Absolutely not. “Anything goes” isn’t something that should ever be said of anyone engaged in BDSM play of any type. Everyone has boundaries, both physical and mental, and this is a conversation that should ALWAYS be had before you engage in any type of BDSM, especially bondage, and you should also both check in throughout play. You can be very much attracted to the idea of something in theory and then not that into it in reality, and in that case, play should always be stopped.

However, the range of potential pleasures is almost endless! Penetrative sex, non-penetrative sex, sensation play — spanking, playing with pegs, wax, ice, etc.—whatever your partner is into is likely to be heightened when they’re tied. And it’s always fun to find out what they like best!

A.C. ROSE: Is expert rope play one of the more sophisticated aspects of modern BDSM? Or is it just a normal part of the lifestyle?

MORPHEOUS: BDSM term is an umbrella term for many different types of play, and a lot of kinky folks aren’t into rope play at all. However, when you’re at expert level of anything, I would say you’re moving towards the more intense end of the spectrum. You don’t get to be a master at rope without putting in a lot of time, effort, learning and most likely budget too, and you wouldn’t do anything of that if you weren’t hugely passionate about it.

A.C. ROSE: What is it about rope … that makes it so erotic?

MORPHEOUS: Everything! For me, it’s the smell, it’s the feel, it’s the look of it, it’s the marks that rope leaves on skin, it’s the flexibility and malleability of the material, it’s the colour… and it’s what you get to do with it. There are lots of different types of rope and different materials that rope can be made from, and each one has a whole different atmosphere to it. Personally, I love the traditional textures of hemp and hessian, as these look incredibly retro and hardcore.

A.C. ROSE: Does your local hardware proprietor know what you use it for?

MORPHEOUS: I like to buy from particular artisans and local producers who definitely know what I’m using their wares for. However, I’ve been known to buy emergency gear at my local hardware store and I’ve been there enough and said enough things loudly that if he doesn’t know by now, I’d be surprised!

A.C. ROSE: Do you also like, and partake in, vanilla sex?

MORPHEOUS: Of course! You can’t be kink 24/7, and sometimes after a long week all I want to do is cuddle with my incredible wife and eat ice cream and watch movies and have “nice” sex. However that never lasts too long. J

Thank you to A.C. Rose and to Morpheous for sharing their thoughts on this delicious topic with us today. Here’s a link where you can order HOW TO BE KNOTTY: THE ESSENTIAL GUIDE TO MODERN ROPE BONDAGE. 

Click to buy.

A.C. Rose is a love, romance, and entertainment columnist and author of steamy romance books. Her Latest book is STAY AFTER CLASS

A super hot professor.
A beautiful student ready to swipe her V-card.
A gorgeous, naked art model.
The sketch that links them all.

Amanda Slade has a major crush on her sexy art professor and wants his help with an important extracurricular activity—losing her virginity.

Professor Jem Nichols knows falling for his beautiful student is a bad idea but he just can’t say goodbye as the semester ends. But the professor refuses to hastily take her virtue. Instead, he wants to slowly teach her the most important lessons of lovemaking.

By the time they’re done, he’ll know every inch of her body. But with the pressure building around his upcoming art show and her sexual debut, will Jem be the one to take her all the way?

School’s out, but the love affair is just beginning.

Find A.C. Rose on the web:

Website
http://acroseauthor.net/

Hot Romance column:  http://thethreetomatoes.com/category/love-sex/hot-romance

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