Tag Archives: Menage

Let’s (Not) Have a 3-Way with My Hot Friend

12 Jan

Imagine a man and woman, a committed couple, cozy in each other’s arms. They’re in front of a fireplace, stretched across a soft rug and covered by plaid blanket A half empty bottle of red wine is within reach. Everything is bliss. Until he asks, “Have you ever thought about us doing it with ______.”  No, blank isn’t Charlie Hunnam or Chris Hemsworth. It’s her friend. The hot one with the perfect legs, curvy ass and Instagram ready smile.  sexy-couple-kissing-making-love-in-front-of-a-fireplace-awen-fine-art-prints

Just like that, the sweetness of the moment is gone, and she’s left with an uncertain queasy sensation that starts in her stomach and spreads to her heart. Never mind what happens to her mind. She can’t decide which of her emotions to deal with first. Anger? Hurt? Disgust? Humiliation?

Imagine she says no. But, because she’s reeling from that freshly-delivered nasty basket of emotions, she replies gently, as though she’s hoping that by speaking softly the whole matter will float up the chimney, drifting out into the starry night sky. After being burned into nothingness, of course.

For some reason, maybe the wine, he doesn’t accept her response. He thinks he should explain, offer some reasons:

Its in the books you read/write.

  • Anxiety, murder, disappointment, heartbreak, betrayal…these things are in our books too, but we don’t want them in real life either. That’s why people read–to experience things in the imaginary part of the mind.

It’s so fucking hot in porn.

  • Hello? Everything looks better in porn. That’s why it generated 97 billion dollars last year. How about we not use porn as a standard for positive, sustainable behavior.

You won’t know unless you try it.

  • This is just childish. For example, consider cutting off your pinky finger. You don’t need to do that to know it is 1) a bad idea 2) very painful and 3) irreversible.

It’d just be the one time.

  • See directly above, childish, with the addition of why does that make any difference? I suppose that could be the strength of this reason, as it makes so little logical sense that there is no equivalent response.

Let’s just ask her, then decide if we want to go through with it. There’s no harm in asking.

  • First of all, that’s disrespecting her reply of no. Secondly, yes, there is harm in asking. In fact, he has already caused harm by asking. It’s this asking business that caused the initial complications and delivered that nasty basket of confusing emotions mentioned above.

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Her anger may be the easiest to decode and deal with. She’s mad because he ruined their night by being a disgusting asshole. She’s mad because he’s suggesting the Hot Friend is hotter than she is. Also reasonable–she’s mad that he was stupid enough to bring it up. WTF.

Hurt, while also terrible, is easy to sort thorough and understand–for her. She’s miserable that he doesn’t think she’s enough. Disappointed that he’s been eyeing, and thinking about, sex with not just other women…but a woman she herself has brought around him. When she tells him he has hurt her by suggesting this one-time-only-night-of-fun, he again makes a mistake.

He assumes his woman feels intimated by the Hot Friend and offers some reasons why she need not see herself as less than. The Hot Friend’s boobs aren’t really that great; one may be bigger than the other. When she smiles, you can see the crooked tooth on the lower left center of her jaw, and its kind of janky. She’s a slob…sometimes when she bends over the tops of her panties show. All these reasons makes things worse, hurting the woman partner more because all it does is reveal how carefully this guy has been studying the Hot Friend.

Disgust. This one is tricky. Confusing. Feeling this way may even make her feel guilty. After all, who feels disgusted by the idea of her friend’s body? Let’s skip over that question and hop to the last emotion because its there that the answer to this one lies.

Humiliation. This one is even trickier than disgust. More confusing. Why does she feel so much shame when he’s the one who has asked the question? Why does she feel crushing humiliation when she’s in the same room with the guy and her friend? After all, the three of them being together used to be the best time ever.

Shame comes from acts we’ve done but also from acts that have been done to us. ‘Good’ shame is the guilt we feel after we’ve done something we know we shouldn’t have. ‘Toxic’ shame comes from others; it occurs when we’ve been exposed in a way we weren’t prepared for or in a way that’s too intimate. So, when he asks her if she wants to do the 3-way with her Hot Friend, he’s crossed a boundary and pulled her along for the ride–whether she wanted to go or not. Without repair, the border that had been clearly around the two of them will remain unclear. Unclear = uncertain. Toxic shames also creates feelings of inadequacy. You don’t need me to tell you what doubt  +  insecurity equals.

Pretending ‘the question’ was never asked isn’t going to work. That’s one genie that’s not going back into the bottle. While only one person, in this case her, realizes it, there’s a crack in the foundation. What’s going to repair it? Probably, only more conversation. Will that work?

Have some thoughts? We’d love to hear them. Share ‘em in the comments.

*****

Isabelle Drake writes erotic romance, urban fantasy, horror and young adult thrillers. Her latest story, BAIT, features a woman who hunts and sells zombies, can be found in the horror anthology Gone With The Dead.

No Swinging, Please, We’re Jewish

19 Apr

By Elizabeth Shore

It’s pretty damn fun to be decadently naughty, isn’t it? To luxuriate in clandestine fantasies and hedonistic playtime that might make your friends utter a collective gasp if they knew you did such things. To have a secret, bad-girl self can be heady indeed, which of course is all part of the draw.

But what if indulging in your fantasies could result in total banishment from the life you know if you were ever discovered? What if you could lose your children, your emotional and financial support system, your house, your friends, your job, your family. Would you still risk all to do what you want to do? Be who you want to be? Such is the question that “Monica” and “James,” members of the Ultra-Orthodox Satmar Jewish sect, had to answer for themselves. ‘Cause the thing is, Monica and James are die-hard swingers.

An article in the New York Post last month profiled their story. By all outward appearances, they’re a conservative, late 30’s Ultra-Orthodox Jewish couple living rule-abiding lives and raising rule-abiding children in strict accordance with their faith. But when the lights go down the wigs and yarmulkes come off. James and Monica might have a delicious little ménage planned, or they might each have dates and sexy time with other people. Doesn’t matter to them. They love to swing and swing they do – keeping it all as top secret as Area 51.

Their clandestine lifestyle is not without risk. As they admit in the article, the consequences of discovery would be dire, including total banishment from their religion and community. Yet not only do they embrace their open-marriage, swinging lifestyle, but they took the risk a step further in order to share their story with the New York Post. As it turns out, Monica and James are skeptics about their faith. Outwardly, they maintain appearances to hold on to their network of friends and family. Privately, they have doubts and they want other Hasidic couples who may be struggling in the same way to know they’re not alone.

Looking at Monica and James’ situation from the outside, one might wonder why they don’t just ditch their religious lifestyle. They no longer believe in the faith, they’re hideously restricted by rules, they lead double lives and have to lie to friends, family, and their kids in order to do what they want. Why not bid it all a big fat sayonara and move on? Well, as one can obviously guess, it’s not that easy. Within the confines of a strict religious sect comes a loss of individuality. One’s choices are based on teachings and rules versus free will, and how life operates outside of the sect isn’t necessarily familiar. An interesting article in The Guardian about defectors who leave those strict communities details their struggles to adjust.

For the Monicas and James’s in this world, leaving what they know isn’t an option, so they accept the fact that they have to slink around like teenagers breaking curfew. For them the risk is worth it, not only for the sexual freedom but the emotional fulfillment as well. Monica has to develop some sort of emotional connection before taking on a prospective lover, which is A-OK by James. As he says, “It’s been beautiful to watch Monica fall in love with someone else.”

It seems to me that exploring a situation like this would be a hell of a great romance. It’s got all the ingredients of a page-turning best seller: cloak-and-dagger double life, big risk, possible disastrous consequences, and of course, steaming hot sex. Yum-o! I see book plots galore! Jewish heros and heroines are practically non-existent in romance. Hey…does anyone hear knocking? I think opportunity might be at the door.

And speaking of opportunity…Join LadySmut bloggers at the RT Booklovers Convention May 3-7, especially at our super special reader event – Never Have You Ever, Ever, Ever. Win crowns, fetish toys, books and more! Goodybags to first 100 people in line! Wednesday, May 3 at 1:30.

 

Elizabeth Shore writes both contemporary and historical erotic romance. Her newest book is an erotic historical novella, Desire Rising, from The Wild Rose Press. Other releases include Hot Bayou Nights and The Lady Smut Book of Dark Desires

 

 

 

Why You’re Not Cruising Down The Threeway Freeway

18 Jan

By Elizabeth Shore

Over the past almost five years now, we’ve written our handful of posts on ménages here at Lady Smut. Madeline Iva has covered both zombie ménage and vampire ménage, and she and Elisabeth SaFleur have written about it from Charlotte Stein‘s point of view. We’ve also had my post on a friend’s recollection of her real-life ménage. If all these threeway fun play posts have gotten you in a mood to dabble in the world of ménage, then how come you’re not cookin’ up a bacon samie of your own? Because, as we’ve learned, it’s damned hard.

A friend recently  hipped me up to an interesting article in the New York Post about the challenges of morphing your ménage fantasy into real-life slap and tickle among you and two lusty partners. On the surface it seems as if it wouldn’t be all that tough to find a willing partner or partners to make the ménage fantasy happen. You’ll see it listed on those top ten lists of women’s fantasies plastered all over the internet. A ménage is kind of like a Miss Texas contestant in a beauty pageant – almost always among the finalists. So in theory, with so many people allegedly lusting for three-ways, finding a partner would be like finding a vibrator. Just take your pick from among the many available. But according to the article, it’s not that easy.

If you think about it, it’s hard enough finding one person with whom you want to have sex multiple times. Sure, you can do a quick hook-up on Tinder for an easy one-nighter, but inevitably it’s just a single night for a reason. Getting the chemistry right is work, and it does indeed require you to kiss a lot of frogs before finding a prince. Or even just someone normal. On top of that, if you’re wanting to add a third person to the mix, now you’ve got two people – you and your partner – who both have preferences for what they like and want in the additional person.

Introducing the concept of a “unicorn” – a bisexual person who joins an existing couple’s relationship – can be an exciting way to add spice. The unicorn can theoretically make that ménage fantasy come true without damaging a couple’s foundation. Kind of a real-life sex toy with no emotional strings attached. Except that the unicorn is, in fact, a live person with his or her (often a her, though not always) own set of feelings and needs. In an article in marie claire, a woman who served as a sexual unicorn ended up getting involved with the husband behind the wife’s back and ultimately tossed aside when it became too complicated. Talk about being the ultimate third wheel.

But the NY Post article interviewed several women who’ve served as unicorns for which the experience has been positive. They cite several reasons: the ability to please and tease both men and women (assuming the ménage is M/F/F and the unicorn is a woman); it’s flattering to be wanted by not one but two people; it allows for the ability to be a pleaser, to make other’s fantasies come true; and it allows one to have intimacy but not the jealousy that can often come when an additional person invades a traditional couple relationship. If you’re just “servicing” the couple, you’re not going to be jealous. Or so it’s supposed to go.

But the downside, as noted earlier, is that unicorns do have feelings and they do have needs. If involvement in a relationship turns emotional but the emotional needs aren’t being met, that’s going to be nothing but a complicated world of hurt. The woman in the marie claire article had that very thing happen to her. She and the husband began developing feelings for one another, but his desire not to leave his wife meant she was eventually kicked to the curb. And the unicorn herself didn’t want only the husband, she wanted the package deal. Since the wife no longer desired it, the unicorn misses out.

So what to do? How do you have a successful threeway? An article at greatist.com offers sage advice, including establishing ground rules and having an exit strategy. And don’t forget about the needs of your unicorn. They’re not just there to serve as glorified toys. Take these tips and you’ll soon learn that unicorns aren’t just fantasies.

What do you say, oh reader? Would you have a threeway? Would you serve as a unicorn? Let us know in the comments below, and don’t forget to sign up for our Lady Smut newsletter. Free stories and fun stuff you won’t get from the blog alone. Go ahead, hit that little pink button. You know you want to.

Elizabeth Shore writes both contemporary and historical erotic romance. Her newest book is an erotic historical novella, Desire Rising, from The Wild Rose Press. Other releases include Hot Bayou Nights and The Lady Smut Book of Dark Desires

 

 

Sexy Santa Story: Talkin’ ’bout Wicked Wonderland

5 Dec

Wicked Wonderland

Once you’ve got the stockings all hung up with care in the hopes that St. Nicholas soon will be there, what’s a gal to do? If you’re like me, you may be in the mood for a spicy read to take away winter’s chill and put you in a merry mood. In that case, you may wish to check out the new erotic fantasy romance from Lisa Whitefern, Wicked Wonderland.

Lilly Rudolph is a well-meaning, devoted daughter who takes a job as a stripper to help her gambling-addicted mother out of financial woes. Lilly’s got problems of her own, namely, a stalker who’s been harassing her for years, a tendency to be accident prone, and stripper co-workers who can’t stand her. While performing a show one night, she runs into Nick Frost and Kris Noelle, half fae lovers whom Lilly had known years ago from college. Back when she was dating Nick, Lilly caught him intimately involved with Kris and found out that her boyfriend and his best friend also happened to be lovers. Feeling shocked and betrayed, Lilly fled them and the relationship and didn’t see them again until they reunite at the strip club ten years later.

Nick and Kris have always missed Lilly and felt incomplete without her in their lives. When they get the opportunity to be with her again, they get her to agree to share one magical night together. Lilly won’t go for more because she doesn’t feel right coming in between Kris and Nick. But they have their fun on that night, and it takes place in a flying sleigh. Kris and Nick were raised by Santa, you see, so they’ve got access to some pretty cool transportation.

Meanwhile, the readers are also introduced to Lilly’s half sister (about whom she’s unaware), Zenobia, who covets the role of Queen of the Fae. She views Lilly as her biggest threat and is going to do what it takes to ensure that Lilly never takes the throne, although Lilly is unaware that she’s fae or that she even has magical powers.

There’s a whole lot goin’ on in this story, at times to its detriment, but one thing that’s definitely hot is the sex. The menage scenes between Lilly, Kris, and Nick are well written and will most certainly raise the temperature in your bedroom. There’s also a quick m/m scene right in the beginning between Nick and Kris that establishes their relationship and is cute, funny, and hot at the same time.

There are a few little things that didn’t quite work for me.  For example, at one point during a battle scene Lilly causes a ship’s mast to break off and fly in the air to fight off an enemy, after which flower petals fall from the sky. Yet later on in the story Lilly still doesn’t believe she has magical powers. Now, I personally have never been able to make inanimate objects whirl about the sky, but if I did I’d certainly start thinking I’ve got some cool powers. Also, Kris and Nick mention several times that they were raised by Santa, so I kept hoping that they’d whisk Lilly off to the North Pole and we readers would meet the big man himself. No such luck. Perhaps Ms. Whitefern has that in mind for a sequel? We can only hope.

Overall this is a hot, fun read that will spice up your holiday in all the right ways. Wicked Wonderland is available at Samhain. I’d recommend that you add it to your list.

Elizabeth

I’m “TAKEN” with Selena Kitt’s New Book

27 Sep

Did you read Elizabeth Shore’s post yesterday about f/f pulp novels?  It was interesting to think about the lesser sales of f/f titles, vs. the better selling f/f/m titles.  I said in the comments section that I thought the numbers expressed the difference between the committed vs. the curious. ;>

Trolling around the internet later on that day, I found out about TAKEN, Selena Kitt’s latest work, on another blog that posts Sexy Snippets every week.  The post about Selena Kitt was by Sandra Bunino (who seems cool) and includes an excerpt.

I think I liked the excerpt.  I like the cover.

A little more explicit than I usually go for, (people, I hate thongs) but look, she’s tastefully kissing the other woman’s taut stomach.  (Yet we know where those lips are going).  Meanwhile, the hot guy in the background watches with a respectful, yet yearning expression.

Here’s an excerpt that I found on Excessia’s website:

Lizzy’s friendship with her older boss, Sarah, turns into something deeper and much more exciting one rainy day after work, and Lizzy finds herself drawn into a world she never knew existed. Sarah has a dominant streak, and as she leads Lizzy into the role of a submissive, the two women become closer than they ever thought possible. But while Sarah, hurt too many times, wears a ring, and tells guys she’s “taken,” Lizzy knows she secretly longs for a man. Determined to find one for them both to share, Lizzy is just about to give up when a dark, handsome, virile answer shows up right under her nose. Lizzy may think she and Sarah are going to seduce David–but she underestimates their handsome co-worker, and David turns the tables on them both. But will he be able to tame the untameable Sarah?

(What is Excessia? Well, it’s a publishing company that Selena Kitt herself runs.)

So that sounds like a GREAT plot– doesn’t it? Oh — and Selena Kitt has two free reads here.

When I was looking up Selena Kitt I liked her “about” page.  She says: “I like to stretch conventional boundaries, whether it’s with style or content, and my work often has some sort of edge or a deeper message. If you’re looking for the formulaic, you might want to look elsewhere, but if you want the different, the unique and even the thoughtful in your erotica, you’ve found the right kitten! 

Thumb’s up to that.

On the other hand, I want to sound out a warning to the Women Who Exclaim ‘Ish’ Frequently.  (WWEIF’s).  looking through her long, long, long backlist, there seemed to titles that indicated plots about babysitters, and some “Daddy” titles.  (Ish ish ish! Double ish.)

I wring my hands.  On one hand I haven’t read them!–so who am I to judge? On the other hand, but I’m still a little bit grossed out by one of the blurbs I read.  Do her ‘eco-romance’ titles and other more ‘woman-friendly’ counter-balance this? Mebbe.

Anyway: Taken.  Check it out & you decide. 🙂

xo,

Madeline

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